Your relationship with your significant other may be leaving you feeling as though you are on cloud nine. However, there is one major caveat that may hinder or obstruct your relationship from flourishing and moving forward. How do you cope if you do not get along with your significant other’s family? Despite the reason for it – for example, differences in religious beliefs or dissimilarities in personalities – it is not your responsibility or obligation to “make” someone like you. It is your duty to exercise respect no matter what you may be experiencing. If your bond with your partner is strong enough, nothing should be able to penetrate or break your union. After all, you two are together for a reason. Never lose sight of that. Always reflect upon what brought you together, what you love about one another and any future planning the two of you may look forward to.
Secrets should not exist between partners. At times, it is easy for outside stressors to infiltrate your relationship. PLEASE TRY VERY DILIGENTLY AS TO NOT LET THIS HAPPEN! You must learn to separate stressors and handle them individually; not clumping them together until it becomes a massive ball of tension that is very difficult to decipher and combat. Talking to your significant other’s family directly can be a great conversation, as long as it is cordial and composed. Don’t lose sight of the true intention for the dialogue. If the meeting becomes heated, politely remove yourself. Honesty can be a wonderful thing, but some may take offense or feel like they are being personally attacked. Know when to walk away.
In my practice I always revert to the saying, “Kill them with kindness.” Your significant other should intervene on your behalf if relations become too strained or tense. Remember to maintain your pride, dignity and self-respect. Do not push the boundaries. Do not allow another individual to dictate how you should act, how you should think and how you should conduct yourself.
Therapy is another option available. Not only can you attend on a solo basis, but you can attend couples therapy as well. It is always refreshing to have a “safe” place where you can unload your emotions and feelings while receiving some professional support. If you don’t try, you don’t know what you could be missing. In addition, talking through your emotions with your significant other or trusted friends is also a beneficial tool. Holding emotions inside can be potentially damaging. Anxiety, fear and worry are some strong emotions. Learn to cope with your stress in productive ways while maintaining personal integrity.
If frustration rears its ugly head when it comes to dealing with the issue of your relationship with your partner’s family, take up exercising! Punching bags, joining a gym, yoga, partaking in classes or going for a walk are some techniques that can help you manage stress. You must find a relaxation activity that works for YOU. Engaging your significant other or friends into your routine does wonders to de-stress your mind, body and soul.
At the end of the day, you need to be satisfied with YOU. Make healthy choices and remember that you must rely upon your arsenal of tools to help you get through life’s pressures. Give yourself kudos. Hug and kiss your significant other and try to forget about the unwanted drama.