It’s pretty amazing how much power Emoji hold, isn’t it? It’s entirely possible to carry out entire conversations, text lyrics and spell out movie plotlines using a series of cute little icons. But here’s the thing: there’s a whole lot of crazy going on with Emoji, too. Have you ever swiped through the lesser-used pages? Things get weird really fast, folks. Like really, what is up with this black-eyed, seemingly soulless demon family?
Anyway, the absurdity of weird Emjoi can turn serious when used incorrectly. It’s important to know the time and place to use certain icons, and which icons just shouldn’t be used at all. Welcome to your guide to Emoji etiquette.
Let’s just get this one over with first:
There is no appropriate use for this Emoji. I don’t care how, um, crappy your day was — find another way to express it. This is not a thing that should ever show up in one’s text notifications. Like, ever. And for those of you wondering, no, this is not a friendly dollop of soft-serve chocolate ice cream. Oh, how I wish that were the case.
Next, we need to cover how to respond to personal tragedies. If a friend shares that something terrible just happened to them, you are at no point to use this to express your surprise and sympathy:
To say this is an exaggerated response would be an understatement. It’s basically The Scream in Emoji form. Be more sensitive, folks. A simple sad face to match your written condolences will work just fine.
It’s also important to keep in mind when to use Emoji to describe daily tasks – and when you shouldn’t. See, if you just want to tell a friend you lounged around and played video games all day, this is totally acceptable:
But if you want to tell someone that you visited your hair stylist today, just type out the words. There is nothing all right about these Emoji:
Seriously, what is going on in that first one?
And finally, if you are trying to tell a friend that you have their back, a quick, lovely way to show your support is to just give them a thumbs up.
The wrong way to send such a message would be to show two dancing twins/friends who apparently are distant cousins of the aforementioned soulless demon family. You may be besties, but black-eyed buds hanging out in matching leotards is just taking it to an uncomfortable level of togetherness.
It’s fun to laugh about the strange and disturbing Emoji that inhabit our phones –trust me, there are plenty more where these came from. Just remember to distinguish between which are good for actual use and which are better left untapped.
Oh, and one more thing: Don’t send threats via Emoji. I’m still not sure who decided it was necessary for the everyday person to have a slew of murder weapon icons stowed in their back pocket.